As a beginner of Second Life, I feel kind of scared to try new things. At first my avatar was a girl with a plain dress and the hair was bounded a horsetail. But I wanted to change my clothes and other things. The problem was I didn’t have any money. How could I buy clothes? And where could I get a job? It seemed very troublesome to me.
Thanks to my friend, she introduced to me some places, where there were a lot of clothes for free. She first teleported me to a ballroom where she said she met a few nice girls offering her useful information. And they even gave her some cards. There I got my first new clothes for free. There were two nice gowns that are quite beautiful.
Then she teleported me to another place where there were a lot of aisles like supermarket. And many boxes are lined there. Those were boxes of free clothes, I could have many choices. Most of the girls’ clothes were dresses. Some of them I liked very much. Of course there are shops, but the items cost money. I would wait until I earn money to go shop.
Well, to me it was a special experience. It was kind of like beginning a new life. I think this do encourage me to explore Second Life world.
[2:43] alicealice Zepp: http://journalisticwritingclass-heather.blogspot.com/
回覆刪除[2:43] Brooke Yven: Yes.
[2:43] alicealice Zepp: i did it : )
[2:43] alicealice Zepp: For you XD
[2:43] Heather Alenquer: thank you
[2:43] Heather Alenquer: :)
[2:43] Brooke Yven: It's good to help others. But I suggest Heather try on her self once.
[2:43] Heather Alenquer: I am a slow typer
[2:43] Heather Alenquer: ok
[2:44] Heather Alenquer: my story is about the clothes
[2:44] Brooke Yven: It's okay. :)
[2:44] Heather Alenquer: where to get the free clothes
[2:45] alicealice Zepp: Well your story is familiar to meXD
[2:45] Heather Alenquer: alice told me two places to buy clothes for free
[2:45] Heather Alenquer: ya
[2:45] Heather Alenquer: i want to write about that places
[2:45] alicealice Zepp: You want to describe the place you get free things?
[2:45] Brooke Yven: It seems to be another nice experience. :)
[2:46] Heather Alenquer: sort of like new experience in SL
[2:46] Heather Alenquer: yes
[2:46] alicealice Zepp: i think you can change the title to make it more close to you theme
[2:46] Heather Alenquer: um
[2:47] Heather Alenquer: so i should focus on the "experience"?
[2:47] alicealice Zepp: Yes
[2:47] Heather Alenquer: ok i will do that
[2:47] Alina Roxley: the place is called "freebie heaven"
[2:47] alicealice Zepp: XDDDD
[2:47] Alina Roxley: and i suggest u can post the pic of freebie
[2:47] Heather Alenquer: you know that !!
[2:47] Heather Alenquer: yes
[2:47] Heather Alenquer: i think so
[2:48] alicealice Zepp: And Perhaps you can say more about your helpless feeling at first
[2:48] Heather Alenquer: ok
[2:48] Brooke Yven: Wow, sounds cool!
[2:48] Alina Roxley: y ai knew that long time ago
[2:48] Alina Roxley: lol
[2:48] Heather Alenquer: since it is about experience
[2:48] Alina Roxley: forgot to tell u that
[2:48] Alina Roxley: i thought u come to SL only for classes
[2:48] alicealice Zepp: It will help us to understand how importand or what those free things means to you
[2:49] alicealice Zepp: Well not really XDDDDDDD
[2:49] Heather Alenquer: ya i thought so
[2:49] alicealice Zepp: : )
[2:49] Heather Alenquer: ok anything you think i need to revise?
[2:50] alicealice Zepp: I think a short one is ok but you can change it into paragraphs
[2:50] Heather Alenquer: yes
[2:50] Alina Roxley: i agree that u can describe more about ur feelings about SL in the beginning
[2:50] Heather Alenquer: okay
[2:51] Alina Roxley: and separate it into paragraphs
[2:51] Heather Alenquer: that would clear yes
[2:51] Alina Roxley: first paragraph talks about ur scared mood and ur plain dress
[2:51] alicealice Zepp: Yes~~~
[2:51] Alina Roxley: and u can talk about who's the friend
[2:52] Heather Alenquer: ya~
[2:52] Alina Roxley: how did u meet her
[2:52] alicealice Zepp: I was the friend XD!!!!!
[2:52] Heather Alenquer: XD~
[2:53] Alina Roxley: ya i know
[2:53] Alina Roxley: so u should tell us this :)
[2:53] alicealice Zepp: YOu can still mention me XD
[2:53] Alina Roxley: it would be interesting
[2:53] Heather Alenquer: ok i will
[2:53] Heather Alenquer: thank you~
[2:53] alicealice Zepp: ~~~~
[2:54] Brooke Yven: Uh-huh, have we done this?
[2:54] Heather Alenquer: i think so~
[2:54] alicealice Zepp: so do I
[2:54] Brooke Yven: It goes so smoothly.
[2:54] Alina Roxley: and the topic, u don't mention about SL
[2:54] Alina Roxley: lol
[2:55] Brooke Yven: I guess we might be the fastest group to finish the discussing.
[2:55] Brooke Yven: lol
[2:55] Alina Roxley: ya so fast today
[2:55] Alina Roxley: lol
[2:55] Heather Alenquer: oh i didn't notice that
[2:55] Heather Alenquer: i will revise it
[2:55] Alina Roxley: maybe it's because we r dancing so smoothly
[2:55] Alina Roxley: lol
[2:55] alicealice Zepp: XDDDDD
[2:55] alicealice Zepp: A really nice experience XD
[2:55] alicealice Zepp: : )
[2:55] Heather Alenquer: i agree
[2:55] Brooke Yven: hahahahhaah
[2:55] Alina Roxley: ya maybe "free clothes on SL!"
[2:56] Heather Alenquer: that's more clear
[2:56] Heather Alenquer: yes
[2:56] Brooke Yven: I'm planning to write this as the next news.
[2:56] alicealice Zepp: Ya
[2:56] Alina Roxley: haha alice is in so great happiness on SL
[2:56] Alina Roxley: lol
[2:56] alicealice Zepp: XDDDD
Reviewer's opinions.
回覆刪除1. Post the pic of this place.
2. Change title as like “Free Clothes on SL”.
3. Describe more you feelings about SL in the beginning so as to see the difference between then and now.
4. Separate it into paragraphs and in the orders following, the first feeling towards SL, talking about the friend who introduce you to there and find the clothes you’re wearing. It would be more interesting.
5. Set a topic because you don’t mention about SL.
Editor's opinions.
回覆刪除1. Change the title to make it more close to the theme.
2. Express more statement about your helpless feeling at first and also mention about the friend.
3. Separate it into paragraphs although a short news is also fine.
Organizer
Get clothes for free on Second Life.